Then You Look At Me
by Ex Mentis
Summary: Songfic. Kurt and Scott finally realize why they have such a strong bond between one another and why they care so much for each other. Slash, Scott/Kurt fluff.


**Here it is, my first Scott/Kurt Evo fic! I'm so proud of how this one turned out. This is a really beautiful song and I hope you take the time to listen to it before reading. So, without further ado let the fluff commence!**

**X-Men does not belong to me.**

* * *

**Then You Look At Me**

Ever since Kurt Wagner first saw himself in a mirror he had used four words to describe himself: 'Fuzzy blue elf demon'. His first outing with his adopted parents into their small hometown in Germany had not gone well. Kurt had been ten years old at the time and had worn a large traveling cloak to hide his unique appearance. Unfortunately, a very curious six-year-old girl, who had wondered from her mother, had come up alongside Kurt and began tugging at the cloak. The struggle had ended with hood being pulled back and everyone seeing Kurt.

Since then Kurt had never been able to love himself; nor did he ever expect anyone to love him!

----

Scott Summers had spent most of his childhood in that damned orphanage, from the day he and Alex had been separated from their parents and each other to the day Charles Xavier had found him, told him he was a mutant, and gave him a home at the Institute. Not once had he been offered a home anywhere else. Such a thing would have broken most kids, but Scott had always been a fighter.

Scott had long ago resigned himself to the fact that he would never find a loving home with anyone else _but_ the Professor.

----

Two years had passed since the Apocalypse incident. Kurt, Kitty, Rogue and Evan were now all seniors at Bayville High. Jean and Scott had left for the college of their choice. Jean had gone off to a very prestigious medical school in California where she decided to major in Genetics. Scott, on the other hand, decided to attend community college six hours away from Bayville and study Child Development. His dream had been to become either a child psychologist or an Elementary School teacher.

Scott and Jeans relationship, though, had dwindled down to mere friendship due to both distance and evolving feelings in both Scott and Jeans hearts. However, Scott and Kurt's friendship had stayed surprisingly strong.

It was one week before Kurt's 18th birthday and the young German was in his room, talking with his best friend via web-cam.

"So, the big one-eight; how's it feel now being an official adult?" Scott teased.

Kurt grinned and stuck his tongue out, playfully, at the two year older man. "Better than how it was for you to turn the big two-oh. I can still hear the whining and crying: 'Why, God, why? I thought we had a deal!'," Kurt said, mimicking his favorite line from one particular episode of Friends (something to do with Joey turning 30).

Scott chuckled, recognizing the quote. His face, though, quickly contorted into an apologetic smile. "I'm afraid, though, that I won't be able to make it to your party. I'm pulling off seventeen credit hours this semester and a part-time job. I've got two papers to type up and an exam."

Kurt's features immediately fell, he had been hoping, no, _expecting_ Scott's presence at his party. More than anyone else, he wanted his best friend with him. They had been through so much together as both the X-Men and as regular teenagers.

Scott saw his friends' downtrodden expression and his heart instantly broke. '_What the hell_,' he thought, '_I'm really upset that that he's upset but…heartbroken_?' "Listen, how about this: next weekend I'll come over for two days and we can hang out together like we used to, that sound good?"

Kurt smiled and said, "I'd _love_ that!"

Scott smiled before turning off the web-cam.

Kurt sighed, he had discovered a few months ago that he was of the homosexual persuasion, but not until now had he ever fallen for another guy as hard as he apparently had fallen for Scott. Kurt snorted in disgust. '_Like he'd really love me back. He's only friends with me because we've lived together, fought together and hung out so much. No one could ever love me_,' he thought bitterly. Six months after the Apocalypse incident he had over-heard Amanda talking with her friends about him, and how she was planning on breaking up with him. It had reaffirmed his decision to never expect love from anyone else, much less himself.

Outside Kurt's room Charles Xavier rolled by on his wheelchair. He had long ago taught his X-Men to shield their minds from any physic mutant who might try to pry their way in, and so he had let his guard down and was flooded by Kurt's depression. After pulling himself together he slowly and quietly opened Kurt's door and saw Kurt at his desk, head in his hands, crying. Xavier was no matchmaker, but he did know where to find one.

----

"Wait, back up a second…you want me to what?"

"It's quite simple Jean: talk to Scott and see if he might have similar feelings for Kurt. At the very least hint at Kurt's feelings and persuade him to be at the party."

Jean Grey sighed and said, "What makes you think he'd even listen to me. Kurt is closer to him than me."

Xavier's astral form, which currently stood in the middle of Jean Grey's apartment, smiled and said, "Because you two have history. You two know each other better than any two people ever could. He still trusts you implicitly."

Jean brought her finger to her lip in a contemplative gesture and said, "I don't know…but for Kurt's sake I'll try." She smiled slyly before saying, "It has been a while since I nosed my way into someone else's love life; it'll be quite refreshing."

Xavier's astral form chuckled while rolling its eyes before saying, "Jean, you haven't changed a bit."

----

It was now three days before the party and Scott was at his computer desk trying to negotiate with his printer. He had offered it toner and more paper, but it still refused to print his fifteen-page essay on the psychological effects of growing up an orphan. It was nowhere near Nobel Prize material, but for Scott it was his pride and joy. It had forced to him to recollect some of his more painful memories.

His negotiations came to a halt when he heard a knock at the door. "Don't you think I'm through with you Mr. Printer; I'll be back!" Scott proceeded to the door and opened it.

"Jean? What are you doing here?"

"Well I've got all my work for the week completed and decided I needed to pay a visit to some old friends. Plus Kurt's birthday is in three days so…here I am!"

"Well, come on in, can I get you something to drink?"

Jean gave a negatory shake of her head, walked over to the couch and sat herself down on it. "So," she started, trying to sound casual and without purpose, "how're your classes going?"

Scott sat down opposite of Jean and said, "Great! I actually got to spend time at the local orphanage and spend time with some of the kids. I think I've found where I belong." His smile went from ear to ear.

Jean smiled too, for as long as she'd known Scott she had always been aware of his ability to relate better to younger kids than his own peers. _This_ was where Scott was meant to be. She had been so deep in her own thoughts she didn't hear Scott's question. She looked up at him and asked, "What?"

Scott chuckled and repeated, "So how are your classes?"

"Oh, very nice actually; I recently submitted an essay to my professor on mutation and got an 'A' on it."

Scott nodded in approval, which then lead to an awkward silence. She was about to call her plan off when Scott asked, "So why are you _really_ here, and by 'here' I mean my apartment?"

Jean sighed in defeat, Scott could be so oblivious sometimes, and so painfully observant other times. So, she chose the direct approach.

"Scott…I've been thinking lately, our relationship ended rather abruptly. I know a long-distance relationship would have been hard but it wouldn't have been impossible. There's also the fact that of all of us who attended Xavier's Kurt is the only one you stay in touch with a lot."

"The ending of our relationship was a consensual thing: we were going in two different directions, and it wouldn't have worked. As for Kurt, he's my best friend, almost a brother!" Scott stopped; his heart ached at the thought of Kurt. The memory of his disappointment and the fact that they were so far apart hurt so much…and he couldn't understand why! It had never been this way with Alex before, and the distance had been much greater, so why Kurt?

Jean sensed Scott's train of thought and came to sit down beside him. "Have you ever thought that, maybe, you're in love with him?"

Scott spun around to Jean with a shocked look on his face. "Love?!" he exclaimed.

Jean nodded and said, "You enjoy his presence, you hate to see him disappointed, you care a great deal about him…need I go on?"

Scott shook his head, she had a point but, in love with Kurt Wagner? It wasn't that he was opposed to the idea of a homosexual relationship nor was he opposed to the idea of a relationship with Kurt. What floored him was that it had been right under his nose all this time and he had never seen it.

Now that he thought about it in greater detail he realized he would enjoy being in a relationship with that adorably goofy fuzz ball. Scott chuckled.

"What's so funny?" Jean asked, though she had a pretty good idea.

"Thinking about Kurt, how his eyes are such a mesmerizing shade of yellow, his enlarged canines which give his smile that mischievous hint, and those cute little elf ears!"

Jean burst into laughter; Scott definitely had it bad for Kurt. Never once had he ever said such things about her. "Do you realize how much of a dork you sound like?"

Scott smiled sheepishly and said,"I can imagine."

"So, how are you going to approach this matter?"

Scott grinned and said, "I've got a plan, but I need your help."

Jean had never been so jealous of Kurt in her life!

----

Saturday night came and Kurt's party was in full swing. He'd received a couple of movies (including 'Bicentennial Man', his favorite), CD's and video games. All that remained was one unmarked box that could have housed a desktop computer.

"Who is this from?" Kurt asked as he examined the box from head to toe.

"Who cares man, just open it!" Evan said.

Kurt did as he was told and opened the box to find a karaoke machine. He looked over to Jean, Kitty and Rogue who were trying to look innocent but failing miserably.

"Oh come on, Kurt! We've all heard ya sing. Not like yur gonna embarrass yur self." Rogue said.

"Oh, all right…but if I hear one giggle there will be hell to pay!"

After Kurt set up the karaoke machine with help from Forge he looked through the available options. He decided upon a ballad that was originally sung by Celine Dion; which had, in fact, been written for 'Bicentennial Man'.

He wished Scott was here beside him. His mere presence had always given him great courage. He always felt safe and protected when Scott was near…but now he felt exposed and nervous.

"_Laugh and cry,  
__Live and die,  
__Life is a dream we are dreaming.  
__  
Day by day,  
__I find my way,  
__Look for the song and the meaning_.  
_  
Then you look at me,  
__And I always see,  
__What I have been searching for.  
__I'm lost as can be,  
__Then you look at me,  
__And I am not lost anymore_."

Kurt took a deep breath and realized the meaning of this song. Every time Scott had ever looked at him and smiled he'd felt like something he never imagined he'd ever feel: _love_! He had made up his mind long ago to never expect such an emotion from someone, yet there it was. Oh how he missed Scott.

"_People run,  
__Sun to sun,  
__Caught in their lives ever flowing.  
__  
Once begun,  
__Life goes till it's gone.  
__We have to know where it's going_.

_Then you look at me,  
__And I always see,  
__What I have been searching for.  
__I'm lost as can be,  
__Then you look at me,  
__And I am not lost anymore_!"

Kurt swore he heard footsteps behind him, and…was that an arm moving around his waist? Suddenly another voice spoke up, one that was only too familiar:

"_And you say you see,  
__When you look at me,  
__The reason you love life so_."

Kurt:  
"_Though lost I have been..._"

Scott:  
"_I find love again…_"

Kurt:  
"_And life just keeps on running…_"

Scott:  
"_And life just keeps on running…_"

Together:  
"_You look at me and life comes from…you_!"

Everyone in the audience broke into applause as the two shared their first kiss, deep, passionate, and full of the love they felt for the other. At last Kurt and Scott had found true love.

**End**


End file.
